"I" statements are divisive.
Preface: The following is a first pass response to the bad advice that we keep hearing out there. It's important to know that I write...
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peterjones3000
- Feb 27
- 2 min
The Binocular Vision of Couples Therapy
Couples therapists are at their best when they take a binocular (double-lens) view of you as a couple during therapy. We need to look for...
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peterjones3000
- Oct 28, 2023
- 6 min
The Fifth Horseman of the Apocalypse; or: "We Said".
I write these blogs mainly to help new couple therapists identify problems they can help their clients notice and understand. Some...
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peterjones3000
- Sep 16, 2023
- 4 min
"I want to work on communication"
Note: I write these blogs as a consultant to therapists wanting to start working with couples. But there is also a take-away for couples...
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peterjones3000
- Feb 13, 2023
- 2 min
From Rupture To Repair
Ruptures and repairs are made of the same things: interactional moves or their absence. ▾ A rupture is caused by any threat-raising move...
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peterjones3000
- Dec 21, 2022
- 7 min
The Purpose-Driven Fight
•Q: My boyfriend and I are writing you together. We get in fight after fight. Is fighting like cats and dogs a sign of incompatibility?...
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peterjones3000
- Oct 11, 2022
- 3 min
Still Doing the First Fight?
• What couples remember as their first fight is the first time they got shaken out of the ceaseless protection from the world that their...
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peterjones3000
- Sep 7, 2022
- 5 min
One success is enough.
Dear Peter: Q: Call me Nora. When Sam (also a pseudonym) and I get started on something we disagree about, it starts ok, we seem to...
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peterjones3000
- Jul 23, 2022
- 1 min
The body is an alarm system.
The body-mind is an alarm system. A couple must know what sets off each partner's alarm system, and what disarms it. If you or your...
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